Daily Archives: November 29, 2011

For Parties to which I should not be invited: Telephone Pictionary!

Jana: I recently played a really fun game that I’d like to share, advertise, and encourage (all meaning the same thing? Quite possibly). The game is “Telephone Pictionary,” and it works just like that game “Telephone” that you definitely played at a childhood birthday party when, if you were me, you were really just plotting a way to get your mom to call and ask you yes-or-no questions (ie, “Are you having fun?”, “Do you want to leave?”) so that you could tentatively say into the phone, “No?, Yes?”, and then explain to the party-throwers that your mom really needed you to go home now sorry!, thus escaping another round of “Telephone.”

Now that you’re an adult, though, you should know about “Telephone Pictionary” – Yes, you should. Despite the fact that this, like all games played in groups, is one you should really just start playing instead of having someone explain the rules while no one listens, Here are the Rules!:

– Cut up a bunch of pieces of paper.

– Give everyone the same number of pieces as there are people.

– Have everyone write a phrase on their first piece of paper. This phrase should be anything weird and interesting. One I used last time was, “Long-lost cat (ran away 2 years ago) shows up on day of big family event; reactions are mixed.” You get the idea.

– Once everyone has written the phrase, pass your pile of papers, with the phrase piece on top, to the person on your left.

– That person receives the phrase, and, on the next piece of paper, draws the phrase as best they can.

– The pile is then passed again, with the drawing on top this time.

– The person receiving the drawing then re-interprets the drawing into a new phrase, writing whatever they see.

– The paper is passed again….

You get it, right? It’s like telephone with pictures. By the end, the phrase has become “Jewish family in ceremonial garb eats large animal; some people are crying”, or something like that. It’s hilarious! And it helps if you are drinking.

It also helps, I will say, if you have some artistic ability of some kind. Unfortunately, despite spending my youth at an alternative elementary school that emphasized artistic expression, I am UNABLE TO DRAW. Worried by the title, I vocalized this when the game started, and it was laughed off. “No worries! It doesn’t have to be good!”, my friends encouraged. But by mid-game, I was given a handicap (“Oh my god ok, just LABEL something”), and by the end I think that the group, while having a good time, was genuinely concerned about me.

Here are a few of the pictures I drew, for your viewing pleasure:

The prompt for this one was something like, “The monopoly man is now homeless.”

You can see my thought process here: At the top, he’s on a monopoly board, and then afterward he’s in some kind of… homeless mire? Also, in the beginning he is wearing an upside-down top hat. My only explanation for this is that I quite literally forgot what a top hat looked like, panicked, and drew that one instead.

Marilyn Monroe fights a tiger.

Ok. So this one was supposed to be Marilyn Monroe fighting a tiger. Obviously, I forgot what tigers look like. Also obviously, I don’t have any idea what Marilyn Monroe looks like. The zig-zag in the middle was supposed to represent the fight, I think, because by the time I’d drawn Marilyn and the tiger, I realized that they were far away from each other and seemed fairly complacent. The thing behind Marilyn was supposed to be a movie screen – the concept, at least, was high minded: She in her world, he (the tiger) in his. Unfortunately the person interpreting this thought that the movie screen was a postcard, so.

Finally there’s this:

A black herd eats pancakes.

Here, we have the most questionable picture – the one that is yes, maybe, a little racist. This came at the point at which I had been granted that label handicap. The problem here stemmed from the fact that the prompt read “A black nerd (possibly Urkel?) eats pancakes”. Here’s where that tricky little issue of how similar Ns and H’s sometimes look came into play. I thought it said a black HERD. So I drew these four curly-haired people, as apparently all I know about black people is that they have afros? What? Or maybe, just maybe, I was avoiding black face – yes, let’s go with that. And I labeled – of all things – their bottle of syrup.

So, there you have it. I cannot draw, and in retrospect, should not be allowed to play this game again. But have fun guys! Call me after when you’re ready to do something that’s more up my alley, like just drink in silence without using other special skills.

Catherine: I can’t read this post without getting extremely upset that you are so far away. I need to play this with you, basically right now, because ohmygod, I would get free reign on just making fun of you and how terrible you are at drawing. And nothing is better than making fun of you, and of us, and how bad our lives are/can be.

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